Stop thinking everyone wins over you

orqVu3Y - Imgur

I hit an epiphany lately. And I’m sure it applies to you too.

Okay how often is it when somebody, be it a loved one or just a friend upset you and/or annoy the hell out of you?

It can be pretty upsetting eh?

You in turn feel sad, angry, upset and even really hurt.

You think about it for days after, “Why did he say that?”, “Why did she do that?, “What did I do to deserve this shit?”

It goes on and on, that negative train.

Now here’s the thing, it’s very easy to go down that path. It’s very easy to jump to conclusions in your head.

And the most likely of them all? You think you lose.

I can personally attest to this. I used to think that, whenever my girlfriend made me upset by saying something hurtful (Oh boy, sometimes when she’s emotional, she says the dumbest things ever) that I “lost” to her.

Then I get emotional and think of all sorts of crap in my head.

That’s the problem.

We always feel like life is a competition.

That shouldn’t be the way.

Whoever that has made you upset, loved one or not, they don’t “win” you or have that upper hand. They didn’t hurt your pride, ego or whatever too. It wasn’t their intent.

Here’s what you should think of instead:

“He didn’t mean it.” – Therefore, it is NOT true. It is false. Don’t psyche yourself into think it is real. Dump it.

“She doesn’t know what she’s saying.” – Because she was probably just emotional and said things out of impulse. No one, and I mean NO ONE can be that stupid to really mean the hurtful things they say.

“They still love me.” – They really do. Don’t ever forget that. Like you, they slipped a little from time to time.

*Controversial next point*

This is what I like to think of sometimes-
“Geez. Sometimes they’re really fucking stupid.” – Yep. Call it ego, or whatever. That’s what I think of my friends, family and girlfriend when they piss me off.

I jump to this conclusion because I’m extremely self-aware of the situation. I know I can always rise up, simply take it as a challenge and learn and grow from it. I’ll help others at the same time too.

It is certainly way better than harbouring angry thoughts of how they “won” or think they got away with pissing me off.

You know what I mean?

And with that, remember, don’t take everything so personally.

Just chill.

So I’m showing you these to help you out today. These will teach you how to deal properly in a relationship, you know, quarrels and all.

Best to meet the right person in the first place.



Don’t let a toxic partner drag you down man. You should be happy with your relationships.

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  1. Eunice - April 24, 2014 5:17 am

    Suppose that, every year, it falls on your shoulders to organize the playoff pool. On the surface, it’s a small thing, but you may start to resent it if it makes you feel like you’re allowing others to take advantage of you. And what about your career? Business leaders can empathize and seek collaboration and teamwork, but ultimately must take responsibility and make decisions for themselves. Stop wavering and take charge.

    It’s great to be perceived as a nice guy, but if achieving that image comes at the expense of your self-confidence, physical health, career goals, and the success of your interpersonal relationships, you need an injection of backbone. By our actions, we teach people how to treat us. You can adjust your behavior and change their attitudes toward you.

  2. Wan - April 27, 2014 10:18 am

    It’s about perception. We feel that we lost because we give a meaning to that action. I like the way you advocate not to accept what people say outright and to think of an alternative interpretation.


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