Alden-tan.com

So like, that’s why people die you know?

A little short fiction I wrote. Just casual. Enjoy! Oh hey there. You’re new right? What am I talking about, of course you are! Everyone who comes through this office is new. I can see you’re edgy. It’s okay. Take a load off. It’s going to get better now, depending[…]

Read More »

Masturbate and wonder

Your biggest tool to know if you’re really in love with her or not. Right after you’re done, wonder: Do I want to watch a movie with her? Do I want to text her randomly just to find out how her day has been going? Do I want to learn[…]

Read More »

Nice Club

Welcome to Nice Club. First rule of Nice Club: You do not talk about Nice Club. Second rule of Nice Club: You do NOT talk about Nice Club! Third rule of Nice Club: If someone says, “Uh huh”, looks down and rolls their eyes, your being nice is over and you should really[…]

Read More »

Types

Every time somebody asks me, “Hey man, what kind of girl do you like? What is your type?”, my answer today is always: “I don’t believe in types anymore. As long as we can get along, that’s good enough for me.” Indeed, I don’t believe in types anymore. I don’t[…]

Read More »

That’s Okay

2016 was honestly horrid for me, marking the year where for the first time in my life, I contemplated if I had depression. Fortunately, I did not. Never did. But that did not discount the fact that I started to strongly hate life. I may have gotten out of bed[…]

Read More »

Heaven is a clickbait media company

You died. And you made it! You got to heaven. How did you die? It doesn’t matter. You made it. It’s all good now. So, let me give you the rundown. You’re only human after all. Let me tell it to you in terms you can understand, though I think[…]

Read More »