Nearly 30 and still an angsty boy: Age… just a number?

age just a number

A couple of weeks ago I turned 29.

And I still slam doors at home. I’m rude to my mom. I get pissed when my maid isn’t around and there’s no one to cook my meals. I get annoyed easily with the little things, like people who take too long to walk out of an elevator. I worry too much sometimes. I over think and over analyze simple situations. I question my own manhood because I’ve never gotten into a fight before. I’m also the sensitive one in the group, so much so I will not turn up for anything as long as someone I do not like is there.

Clearly, this isn’t going to be a “lessons I’ve learnt in life after living for 29 years” post because I still cry for attention.

The fallacy of turning “old”

I speak for those still going through their twenties.

We like to talk about, mostly in a frivolous tone how we’re getting old and that life is passing by way too fast. Our bodies don’t seem to have the same amount of energy as before as we tire out easily. We feel old when we go to a club as we say, “Wow. This place is filled with annoying kids.” Or maybe you’re already like me, wherein the brightness of my smartphone, if adjusted any higher than half the bar, hurts my eyes.

But all that is just that. Talk. When we talk like that we don’t even know half of what’s really coming, or is already there in our lives.

I don’t think anyone has a true idea of what growing up and becoming mature really means when we put them side by side with age.

 “Age is just a number” is honestly a tired, cliche line. Yet, it is supposed to fill us with hope. It’s supposed to tell us that despite your age and growing body, you can still do whatever the fuck you want in life. You just have to be passionate and not care about what others think.

I mean, look at this dude. 104 years in age and set a new record in running. He claims his secret is “doing everything I want.”

Not fond of typical news of old people and feats of athletic excellence? This other 104-year old man runs marathons and drinks beer during the run itself.

You can indeed do whatever it is you want. You can achieve your dreams. You can let go of your responsibilities and go WILD. Your life is the sky.

But nobody wants to talk about the dirty stuff. 

When it comes to age, it’s always about growing old, joking that we’re growing old and then attempting to lighten the mood with the whole age-is-just-a-number cliche.

When we grow up, we all still have our own problems and challenges. That means we still retain the same amount of angst, agony and pain from when we were young.

And that’s how we end up judging each other.

We may try not to act like kids anymore, but we still retain our inner child. Whatever that means to you, you may find it right here.

In that sense, we’re all still angsty little kids.

Angry people are acting out as nobody helped put out the fire. After that, that’s when you beat yourself up for wondering why you said those things you didn’t mean.

Emotional people still can’t get a grip. Their sensitivity are at an all-time high and then they cry over the smallest thing.

People from all over suffer from depression. It doesn’t give a crap about age.

People… we are still annoying each other.

Don’t deny it now. We’re all guilty of it. We all have skeletons in the closet.

How to always defy your age and be a happy little guy

But of course, being an angsty little bitch isn’t going to help you or anyone.

Age is truly just a number, a tag, a label, a queue number. There’s no real reason to show it off. One does not buy new clothes from the shop and leave the price tag on.

Fuck your birthdays. I mean, celebrate and have fun and continue to celebrate life bitch.

1) Don’t judge others

You don’t know who they are or where they are from.

When you judge, you’re just exhausting yourself as you waste time and energy on others.

When you judge, you’re indirectly judging yourself as you’re throwing mirrors out there to reflect your own convictions and flaws.

That’s how people grow old and become grumpy.

2) Keep doing you but elevate it

If you act the age that comes with a set of rules passed down by society and others, then you’re living up to others’ expectations.

If you act according to your deepest desires and finally realize that you aren’t growing any younger, you can start feeling young forever.

So elevate it by feeling the fear, getting uncomfortable and doing shit you really want. That’s how you become alive.

A lot of friends commended me for doing my ALS Ice Bucket Challenge video. Little did everyone know that I was uncomfortable as hell doing it. I never did videos for my blog before. I knew I mumble and slur when I talk. My hands were shaking in the video. I wondered if taking off my shirt inside was too much. After I watched it, I decided to cut down on beer. Again.

But after that, for the rest day, I felt alive. It did not have to do anything with how old I was.

3) Surround yourself with like-minded idiots

Idiots, because they’re friends so close to you that you can call them idiots without any consequences.

Idiots, because they still screw up. And the bonds of a real friendship are forged through humble flaws and helping each other, not putting yourselves on a pedestal and congratulating each other for cheap thrills.

Idiots, because you all still get together and do stupid shit together. These are my friends doing the bucket challenge in support of me.

Age has no place here. I get along pretty well with dudes seven years younger than me or ladies fifteen years older than me. And I’m glad to be their friend.

4) Act your age by not wanting to identify with angsty bullshit

Forget about the number. Let’s just associate bad behavior with bullshit.

If you ever find yourself feeling emotionally out of control, snap out of it by remembering who typically behaves badly.

E.g. If you feel pissed off, perhaps on a bad day because your food is cold, then remember that only 8-year old kids are the ones who get upset over small matters like that.

5) Use age to impress the hell out of others

Finally, this is one aspect of age I think most people don’t use enough, because they’re too busy worrying about getting and feeling old.

As long as you act out of your age, people will be impressed. It’s that easy. Since people are judgmental creatures, you might as well make it work for you.

I’m 29, but most people mistake me of 25, or even 22. I’m still a Bboy. I don’t work, but do what I love everyday. And some friends have told me I look like Leonardo Dicaprio. I’ll let that idea float on its own for whatever benefits.

Age can be easily used for your own benefit. It’s scalable. It can be exploited. You just need to stop following the script others give you.

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  1. natasa - September 8, 2014 9:12 pm

    you dont look like Leonardo Dicaprio 🙂

    • alden - September 9, 2014 6:53 am

      Brad Pitt then.

  2. Colette - September 9, 2014 6:49 am

    You are a funny straight up guy. Do you have Aspergers by any chance? Keep doing what you love.

    • alden - September 9, 2014 6:52 am

      Er no.

  3. Sebastian Aiden Daniels - September 9, 2014 11:04 pm

    Hahaha. I read the Collette comment. I wonder why she thought that. Part of living is dealing with emotions, regardless your age. I have recently read two books, one by the Dalai Lama and the other by Thich Nhat Hanh. They both talk about how they still have to deal with anger and other emotions. I give you props for writing about your emotions and “negative” sides honestly because they appear in all of us from time to time, what matters is how you act in response to them.

    I always get that I’m way older than I look because of the way I act. Keep rocking the youthfulness : D.

    • alden - September 10, 2014 3:37 am

      Haha that’s awesome! Any celebrities looking like you? 😛

      I like that. It’s real. Unbridled positivity isn’t my thing.

  4. Jessie - September 11, 2014 1:43 pm

    There’s this cosplayer named Kaname and even he’s already 36, he enjoys and earns a living from his child at heart hobbies. Because of this, age is just a number.

    • alden - September 14, 2014 2:12 pm

      Gonna check him out!


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