In this year alone, from my perspective, I was somehow accused of wronging some people, most of whom weren’t even close to me.
I am not exaggerating when I say that all I did was go about my day, do totally non-criminal things, help others when I can when boom, I got accused of some bullshit and then it became my fault.
As a result, I lost a couple of friends, although frankly, I felt no real loss because not only did I not know what I did “wrong” at all in the first place, but that I felt absolutely done with toxic bullshit.
It occurred to me then, how many of us get sucked in to toxicity without knowing it, hence why this post is important.
We need to start looking inwards to become a better person and from there, we can then look outwards to start recognizing toxic behavior, especially in your so-called friends or family even.
Some pretext: You can tell the most about someone’s personality through the subtle things that they do.
Yes, subtle. The small movements. The unsaid things. The untold stories. I strongly believe in this.
It’s too easy to judge someone based on reputation or some horrible deed that they did. It’s too easy to know someone is completely fucked up in the head based on extreme behavior alone. These are too obvious.
What isn’t obvious are the small, subtle things. They’re thieves which sneak into the night to steal happiness from your life.
And everyone is potentially a victim, be it the toxic persons themselves or the people around them.
It’s actually scary because as the headline states, the steps are easy. Anyone can use it while those around them would be blinded into giving excuses non-stop.
How to let the entire world know that you’re an insecure and unhappy person in 9 easy steps
1) Your first reaction should be to always complain just because you can
And indeed, many people adhere to this. Why? Because they can. That’s all they know.
When shit doesn’t go your way in life, it’s natural to want to complain. But to do it every time over everything? That speaks more about yourself more than the problem itself.
Only whiny bitches complain about the problem. Resourceful people would quickly look for the solution instead or simply let it go.
There’s a difference between letting off some steam and complaining all the damn time. If you partake in the latter, trust me, your friends are tired of hearing of it. You don’t know it only because they’re too polite to let you know.
2) Let others know about how you dislike a minimum of at least five people over a short period of time
In life, you’re bound to run into people you dislike. And in conjunction with the first point, you complain about it to let off some steam. That’s perfectly fine.
But if you do it too often and too fast? Then it’s going to turn inwards as people around you start to wander you’re the real problem instead.
I remember talking to some girl who seemed to, every couple of days, find someone to complain about or hate on. At first, it seemed normal. After a while, I thought, “Wow, you seem to hate a lot of people for different reasons. Are they truly as fucked up as you claimed? Or are you just antagonizing them?”
And yeah, it was very tiring.
Honestly, it’s only logical to wonder who is the one with the real problem. It’s kind of like math:
If Person A comes into contact with five people and hates all of them for different reasons in a short period of time, you ought to truly think deeply and wonder if said five people all dislike Person A.
Five people disliking one person versus one person disliking all of them. Unless Person A is the only adult or the only human among animals or something, it’s not hard to find out who’s the one with the real problem.
3) You must turn angry and upset the minute something doesn’t go your way. No exceptions
Then go ahead and complain about it.
Look, not everything in life goes your way. Life happens and everything fucks up from time to time. That’s just one of the meanings of life itself.
It’s one thing to react strongly and use that energy to make a change. It’s another to simply get upset and allow it to ruin your day entirely.
Unhappy people do that, that’s why they experience more bad days than good ones; more things to complain about. And yes, they see a need to spread that negativity to those around them.
4) You must treat customer service staff like absolute crap
This to me is the benchmark of a person’s innate unhappiness and insecurities.
Sadly, a lot of people have it in their heads that the customer is always right, henceforth, they get to act like dickheads.
Straight up, if you see a need to take your frustrations out over another human being, especially when you think status and money allow it, then you’re only truly showing what kind of person you are.
All of us lead different lives, but we’re all equal beings who are going to die eventually. To want to step over others just so that you can feel like you’re ahead is not only a truly terrible thing to do, but shows that you simply don’t care or respect others.
And only the smart ones will know that that actually equates to not caring or respecting yourself enough to want to grow.
5) You must take it to social media all the time
When you’re unhappy with something or someone, be sure to post it on social media.
Remember to add in real screenshots to your long rant for added effect. If you want to make your script rich in nuance and subtlety instead, be extremely passive aggressive.
Do this very often. Allude to also a minimum of five people in a short period of time. Let everyone on your list see it.
It truly takes a certain type of person to take it to social media. Oh sure, the rest of us quiet ones are enjoying the spectacle as we whip out the popcorn, but if you think about deeply, the people in the limelight have dived in head-first to indulge in the drama as they scream, “Everybody this is what I think! I don’t care what you really think about it, but please help me share and like so I can shame the other party!”
And like it or not, all of us do care about others think or how they see us. To constantly want to be in the limelight, via social media or not just shows how much self-preservation you lack even if you’re trying to put others down.
6) Never trust or accept your close friends’ honest opinions. Make them take sides instead
Here’s the truth: Your good friends want you to be grow and mature into a better person. They will tell you the truth and reveal your flaws even though it will make you uncomfortable.
Your enablers don’t give a fuck about you as they act like yes men only. And trust me, they will be making use of you.
So what do you do with this information?
If you want to show your friends that you’re insecure and unhappy, do not accept their opinion. Hand them an ultimatum that they must take your side otherwise the friendship is over or at the very least, tell them how wrong they are without an objective point of view.
If you want to show your friends that you’re capable of greater things in life, then eat some humble pie, shut up and listen.
7) Loudly insinuate that money, status or some lame achievement makes you better than others
Don’t bother putting yourself in others’ shoes. Don’t practice any empathy. Don’t even entertain the idea that others come from different backgrounds and hence have a different way of seeing things.
You just need to come across as superior, and what better way to achieve that by using superficial things like money, status or a lame achievement that’s totally out of context, like how this guy I used to hang out with would challenge others to arm wrestling just because he worked out that day.
Be sure to emphasize how much the other party is lacking in money or whatever it is you have yourself. This is to deride his or her capacity to learn.
8) In every story you tell, you must end up the glorious victor who got over ridiculous challenges
I guess this point kind of goes without saying, but I just want to be clear.
After all your complaining, ranting, social media bitching or whatever, you must make it seem like you’re always the winner.
Don’t admit your flaws in any parts of the story. Never inject humility. Use flowery words to put yourself on a pedestal. Be perfect.
Try to dramatize the story too since it’d be hard to disprove you. E.g. A friend once told me while working at a club, he got into a fight every week. He won every fight too.
Another friend once regaled to me how three girls were fighting over him one particular night and he slept with all of them on the same night.
It sounds ridiculous, but this bullshit is true everywhere. It boggles my mind to why they’d want to exaggerate or outright lie about such nonsense because the truth usually comes out sooner or later anyway.
9) Lastly, get offended by everything
Nuff said. Don’t forget to nitpick the fine details in whatever it is that made you upset.
Crucial point: Be sure to be offended by the direct solution itself too because somehow, it made you unhappy anyway. E.g. I once heard a friend say, “I didn’t like the way he said that he was sorry.” And this was after complaining non-stop about how he didn’t get an apology yet.
Rinse and repeat Steps 1-8 with your offended feelings to get the most results.
Pretty soon, plenty of people would know what kind of person you truly are.