How to get the hell out of your comfort zone

Or face your fears. Or do something you really want. Or achieve your bloody ridiculous dreams. Whatever.

So last weekend I joined a big Bboy competition with my boys. It’s the latest in my series of forcing myself to join competitions.

Yes, forcing literally. Why force? Because I want to be better and make up for lost time. For my early years in breaking I pretty much made up a crap load of excuses for myself when in actual fact I just didn’t dare to to push myself. I didn’t dare to jump into a dance circle because I was afraid of looking like a fool. I didn’t dare to join competitions because I didn’t want to lose and end up feeling shitty (as if I was super great and had a chance to win anyway). I was just making excuses.

I was forcing myself to get out of my comfort zone

I find the idea of getting out of your comfort zone is totally intriguing. People who proven themselves and enjoy success pretty much say the same thing. You got to get out of your comfort zone. Your mentors, seniors, parents, teachers or whoever you look up to would probably tell you it’s mandatory to get out of your comfort zone.

The idea of getting out of your comfort zone amuses me because, on the one hand I am all about following your passion, finding and using that feeling of joy it brings forth, feeling good about yourself and just going ahead with life. From there on things will automatically be good as you are following your heart. Who likes feeling totally awkward anyway?

On the other hand, I also think one needs to get out of your comfort zone in order to achieve greatness in life. Why? Because if you really want something in life you got to really push yourself and work hard for it. Getting what you want isn’t supposed to be easy. Also, if you think everything in life should be served to you while you sit on your ass, you are just a spoilt bitch.

I don’t think the big question is: Should we have to feel uncomfortable or some form of uneasiness in order to get what we want. I think a more appropriate question is: How do you get out of your comfort zone?

Face it man. Everyone goes through shit in life, whether they like it or not. Whether you are a super driven and motivated person who wants to achieve greatness or a slacker, we all have challenges. So suit up and prepare yourself!

Getting out of fear

How to get the hell out of your comfort zone

Tell yourself the weird, awkward shitty feeling will pass. Outside of your comfort zone, you’d feel not good, like at all. In the moment you just feel like everything is against you and you fear the future holds nothing for you.

But… it passes. It really does. Hell, when you go home to sleep at night, on your bed, alone, you won’t be feeling that bad anymore.

Getting out of your comfort zone brings great results. Especially when you really want to achieve something. The hardest lessons in life are the fucking real ones. Remember that. Oh you will remember them anyway because they made you feel low at some point! So ease yourself into things by telling yourself you will be experience great results.

For me, when I join a battle, I tell myself, “Whether I win or lose, I will be bringing something home tonight”. Something being, an awesome experience to learn from to push myself in the future.

Just take it step by step. Take it slow. Carry out the MOST ABSOLUTE SIMPLEST task. Keep going. Let the momentum flow. You will go far as long as you don’t stop. If you want to overcome shyness, talk to ONE new dude you hardly know. If you want to start a blog, register the domain first. If you want to run 20 miles, run 2 today.

More importantly, you also have to take it step by step with your mind. You don’t become super awesome or get what you really want overnight. Don’t overload the pressure and stress yourself out too much. Take it easy alright?

Seek inspiration from others. I am talking about a literal 1-for-1 inspiration replacement for yourself. The way I see it, someone out there can definitely do something you can’t. For my case, a Bboy who can dance his heart out in front of everybody without giving a single fuck. So therefore, I simply say to myself, “If another human being can do that, why can’t I?” 

Yeah you are human too. Maybe you need more balls, but there’s really just no reason why you can’t do what you want to do when others are already doing it.

Rip that band aid off. My last advice to you is to just ballsy up, don’t care what about others think , and really just go for it. You know how it is. Don’t like your job? Quit. Don’t like someone? Avoid. Want something? Go for it.

It’s that simple sometimes. For whatever you challenge you face, you will be surprised at the results you will see when you really do something totally unconventional. I force myself to take part in battles. Any regrets so far? No.

Life is just too short for not getting you want anyway. I think comfort zones are meant to be expanded. Imagine a world where you have achieved so much you can just anticipate what’s next and look back at all your achievements. That’s awesome. Start somewhere now. Do something epic, for yourself.

Grow a bigger comfort zone, and pretty soon the world is yours. 

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  1. RyzeConnect - March 12, 2012 3:10 pm

    Great post Alden, I really connect cause I’m a Bboy too. Few weeks ago I went to one of the biggest popping tournaments in Toronto and forced myself to go up and rock it.

    Truth is, I didn’t and froze up some, but the whole experience of it, changed my dance and me in a way that I’m grateful for.

    No such thing as failure it’s all a gift to set up for more greatness 🙂

    • alden - March 12, 2012 4:14 pm

      That’s cool man! Where are you from?
      That’s great that you still managed to get something out of it. It’s to each his own journey. As long as you don’t give up and believe in yourself, your time for greatness will definitely come!

      • RyzeConnect - March 13, 2012 8:22 pm

        Thanks dude! I’m from Toronto, Drake’s city =p

        Where do you Bboy?

        This is one of the hippest blogs I’ve seen, and I like how you talk about real shit 😀

        • alden - March 14, 2012 7:17 am

          I am from Singapore. We have several session spots here. We just had our biggest yearly jam here. Quite a few international crews including Korea came over.
          Thanks man! Looking forward to your email course too 🙂

          • Jason Fonceca - March 15, 2012 3:58 am

            Remember to do the exercises! They’re important ways to create new pathways in your brain. Take New Action!

          • alden - March 15, 2012 9:32 am

            For real man!

  2. Jason Fonceca - March 15, 2012 3:54 am

    Have you read Julien Smith’s (free!) book – The Flinch?

    • alden - March 15, 2012 9:32 am

      Hey man,

      No I haven’t! Is it free? I don’t have a Kindle though.

  3. Alireza - July 5, 2012 8:58 pm

    Nothing beats reality! You fear it that’s why you don’t wanna see it but once you accpet it you be able to understand and let go thus move on to the next reality well and it goes on and on and on as the process called living … becoming !

  4. favour - February 1, 2013 10:08 pm

    i’m just reading your posts and i can tell you they are awesome but i had a problem with”avoiding people you dont like and talking to someone you dont know.”do you talk superficial and how do you know what to talk about?and if u avoid the person does the problem go away and what if the person notice you avoiding them.what do you do?

    • alden - February 2, 2013 1:57 pm

      Hey man,

      The underlying issue is about hanging out with positive people only.

      If they don’t serve you at all, just ignore and move on. Don’t worry about them and their own insecurities.

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  8. Fiona Tay - July 21, 2013 8:24 am

    Thanks for this awesome post! 😀

    • alden - August 4, 2013 8:44 pm

      Thank YOu for coming by.

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  10. Stealth for Men - January 31, 2017 2:22 am

    The root cause of not being able to get out of your comfort zone is insecurity. I’ve learned that “not caring about what others think” is the best way to overcome that. It’s better to do something stupid than to do nothing at all.


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