Alden-tan.com

Has it ever occurred to you that all your problems are just telling you to chill out?

We all get pissed off from time to time. For some of us, it seems to occur a lot, like we spend an amazing 50% of the day feeling frustrated or angry.

The thoughts are always fucking wild. You can’t seem to stop that shit. Like that friend who said something to piss you off and it keeps running through your head, or you come up with crazy-ass scenarios that may or may not happen in the future.

But whatever it is, you’re making shit up.

Problems suck

Like, that’s quite obvious.

I’ll admit. I’ve got a big problem. And I mentioned it above.

Sometimes my thoughts go wild and I go on turbo-auto-pilot mode and the anger builds up. Everything gets exaggerated and worse of all, the solutions don’t seem to be around. I want to beat the shit out of some people, but I don’t want to end up in jail. 

When will it all end? Never? I don’t know.

Problems come in many forms for all of us. Especially the little ones. The LITTLE ones seem to piss you off the most! 

Crowded places. People getting in the way. Fucked up colleagues. That ONE thing your friend said. The rain. That cough that persists.

List…

just…

goes on.

The number #1 solution to all problems

Then it hit me, like a hot girl smiling at you.

No seriously.

If a hot girl smiles at me, I’ll be like, “Oh yeah…“, then all of life’s problems go away.

Put it this way: Do you drink? You know when the first couple of drinks kick in and you feel that little buzz? And you’re… happy?

It’s like that.

There are many solutions to all of life’s problem, but it all can be boiled down to this: Chill the fuck out.

Now, it’s pretty cliché to say chill out, relax or take a breather. I know. It’s also easier said than done.

But what I am trying to emphasize is that, if you believe that it is that easy, that chilling out can work for you and that’s all to it, it CAN work. 

Also, because when you chill out, your brain, body and whatever releases all the happy chemicals that make your life that much better.

Now, isn’t that all you need to be happy and problem-free?

A deeper look into chilling out

I know, it’s not all that easy.

It’s not your fault that asshole cut you off on the road.

You got to pay the bills.

People around you annoy you.

Then check this out: Do you want to be right or do you want to be at peace?

I read that when I was skimming through some book in a book store ages ago. And it stuck.

There’s a huge fucking difference between being right and being at peace.

And only one gives you the happiness you want. 

Being right comes with a lot of unexpected nonsense, like a bitter sweet feeling or short-lived satisfaction. If you ask me, being right only gives you some kind of power over others, but not yourself. 

When you are at peace, you don’t even need to a give fuck about others. 

So, just chill out, and be at peace

Let me conclude by diving down even deeper.

Chilling out is like being in the NOW yo!

Be at peace by focusing on what’s happening at this very moment for you. Don’t think about the future because they do not exist.

Your past only exist in memories, which is like you know, not tangible.

Just look at today, which is your life. And it’s up to you to shape that shit up.

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22 comments

  1. Jason "J-Ryze" Fonceca - April 11, 2012 1:11 pm

    LOVE this post.

    You really started with a punch, about getting pissed off and having problems on turbo, looping through our heads.

    Been there 🙂

    Then bam – relax. And you know, it’s so simple, so easy, and so effective, you’d be surprised how many people say “they cant” – lol. But what, they can get angry, ruin their day, get ulcers, etc?

    If they can do all that, why not relax instead lol.

    I have a trick to relax, and it’s to focus on something in your life that is easy to relax about.

    Babies. Loved ones. Pets. Water. Deep breaths. Your passionate hobby. I don’t think it’s possible to direct your thoughts towards those things and stay pissed 🙂

    Reply
    • alden - April 12, 2012 7:52 am

      Thanks for the comment love Jason!

      Well what I think is, the little things in life can get you down, but little things can go a long way for you and bring everything up!

      Reply
  2. Derek - April 14, 2012 3:26 pm

    Hey, good post. I guess I’m not the only one having mental diarrhea running through my head. Maybe it’s a human thing. Recently I have been practicing a positive self-talk. Yes, I intentionally talk to myself. It goes like this: Anytime I’m aware that I’m running the negative mental diarrhea, I start overriding it whith positive phrases. It is a constant process, I haven’t achieved satori yet;) but I’m having fun with the self-talk thing.
    Love your blog.
    Cheers.

    Reply
    • alden - April 14, 2012 9:13 pm

      Thanks Derek!

      Yes I believe it’s a very natural thing for a lot of people to focus on the negative. It’s toxic if you ask me. It’d take a lot of practise, but overcoming this would definitely have its rewards!

      Try this: Thoughts are just thoughts. They happen all the time, so when the negative ones come along, WATCH them. Watch them come. And then, watch them move along. And you move on.

      Hope this helps 🙂

      Reply
      • Derek - April 15, 2012 4:05 pm

        Hi Alden,
        I did Vipassana meditation in Thailand once, which in true buddhist tradition taught me how to watch my thoughts.
        I studied this stuff a lot, trust me. And I do the “thought watching” too, but to me it is reactive, like I’m waiting for another shitty thought just to watch it? A better way that works for me is a proactive way. I create a magnificently awesome thought, instead of just watching my thoughts. I think I’m a bit smarter than Buddha (he, he), but it’s all good, whatever works for you.
        Cheers

        Reply
        • alden - April 16, 2012 7:00 am

          Hey Derek, thanks for dropping by!

          That sounds interesting. I always felt like trying out some form of meditation, but yeah I thought it’d be too reactive too. Seems like a chore.

          Nice blog you have. You know, as a start, I may want to try out Yoga too.

          Reply
  3. Rodney C. Davis - April 14, 2012 10:26 pm

    Dude! You’re awesome. I got here through your session with Danny Inny. Thank you so much for allowing him to show that to us. I see you’ve put most of what he told you in to place so far. Keep living your dream. Hope to see you soon on the beaches of the world!

    Reply
    • Jason "J-Ryze" Fonceca - April 14, 2012 11:36 pm

      I agree with Rodney, that was bold and vulnerable, Alden, I learned a lot from it, and respect to you.

      Reply
      • alden - April 15, 2012 2:21 am

        Thanks Jason, as usual! Thanks for always being around man.

        Lol it’s funny cause I don’t even know how you guys got to see the Skype session!

        Reply
    • alden - April 15, 2012 2:20 am

      Thanks Rodney! You’re awesome too!

      The beaches of the world it is! It’s actually my aim this year to hit the beaches of the surrounding islands, which is mostly Bali, Phuket, Batam etc.

      Peace!

      Reply
  4. Izzy - May 15, 2012 5:31 am

    Good post man,
    I think chilling out is, as you state, a very hard thing to do sometimes. It’s a process. I am a way more chill person now then I was in my early 20s. It takes time. The more I experience the more I am able to take with ease.

    An irony of it is that by my nature I am not a chill person. I am intense. I like to do a lot of things. I love lists and organization. In my early 20s I was always trying to put out a front like I was super chill and Mr. laid back… That of course didn’t work because I was always battling myself.

    Now, I embrace my intensity and in doing so it has actually “chilled” me out… Kind of crazy and cool how it works out like that.

    Reply
    • alden - May 15, 2012 7:32 am

      Hey Izzy,

      It’s pretty hard for me too, but I like to think about it and in turn tell myself how to tackle my negative thoughts in the future. I’ve trouble controlling the negativity sometimes.

      I know what you mean by embracing the intensity. Sometimes telling myself, “Aww fuck it!” and acknowledge that I am pissed or upset, rather than trying to fake positivity actually helps.

      Reply
  5. Ena - May 22, 2012 5:20 am

    Hey Al, just wanted to drop a line telling you how much I enjoyed that post…

    I’ve been working 14, 16 hour days and cannot afford the time to chill out. I used to get pissed off a lot (well I would say annoyed..), especially when things don’t go my way. Somedays you just think, “There’s a lot on my plate and I can’t even eat it.”, and you want to smash that damn plate! ‘Chilling out’ is really easier said than done. My body finally surrendered today and I am off sick….but feeling the best I’ve had in a while because I can actually CHILL THE FUCK OUT. I needed this before I go The Hulk on anyone within a one-metre radius lol

    And one last thing – you, my friend, keep doing what you do cos it’s good.

    Reply
    • alden - May 22, 2012 6:44 am

      Thanks Ena.

      14-16 hours a day is insane man. I can’t even wake up in the morning anymore.

      Well I wouldn’t just preach quit your job straight away or anything like that, but realize what is normal for you. 16 hours days are not to me. Neither are stupid bosses.

      Haha I remember how sick days were awesome too.

      Reply
  6. Paul E - July 3, 2012 3:10 pm

    Just in the nick of time, this message (yeah yeah, as you said, people might say it’s captain obvious speech) has came today. Therefore I’d like to show my appreciation for this straightforward message. Must… Chill… the… FUCK… OUT!!!

    Last week I put on the side of my job’s computer tower the following:

    #7 Steps to manage your ego

    1. Don’t get offended
    2. Release yourself from the urge to win
    3. Release yourself from the urge to be right (rings a bell?)
    4. Release yourself from needing to be superior
    5. Release yourself from the urge of having more
    6. Release yourself from the need to being identified with your achievements
    7. Release yourself from the need to be famous

    And well, I’ve just started, step by step, baby steps indeed. But 50% is the biggest step!

    Thanks! And release ourselves to be better than the rest. No one is perfect whatsoever!

    Peace from South America

    Reply
    • alden - July 4, 2012 6:12 am

      Thanks for dropping by brother.

      Nice 7 steps there lol.

      Reply
  7. Summer - September 5, 2012 5:52 pm

    I think you hit a really good point here, but I have question.

    I might not have read enough or anything but, have you ever done any psychology research or taken any classes or anything?

    Reply
    • alden - September 6, 2012 6:44 am

      Hey Summer,

      I took an introductory module in psychology back in college. Why do you ask?

      Reply
  8. sengda - September 25, 2012 10:30 am

    yeah i know i need to chill big time with what’s been happening in my life right now . And yeah i would rather have peace then being right .Thanks good post by the way keep it up!

    Reply
    • alden - September 25, 2012 9:50 pm

      So what’s happening in your life right now? Anything I can help with?

      Reply
  9. madina - October 4, 2012 8:13 pm

    Great post! I do enjoyed it! Thanks for the good job!

    Reply
    • alden - October 6, 2012 6:16 am

      Thanks Madina!

      Reply

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