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Don’t say “Shit” when somebody dies

When my dad died almost ten years ago,  I pretty much isolated myself for a bit. I didn’t inform any friends of the news. I just didn’t want to deal with any kind of interaction during the wake. I also didn’t want to let any of my friends see me cry.

After the funeral was done and over with, I remember spending a few days at home still. Any kind of interaction I had was mostly through instant messages online.

Finally, I came out of my little hole after that.

Slowly but surely, I had to tell some friends about it.

And the most common reply I got was, “Shit.”

This stuck on for many years actually. I remember going on a first date with a girl whom I thought was gorgeous. When the conversation led into the subject of my dad, the first thing that came out of her mouth was also, “Shit.” She looked ugly after that.

Well I guess different people have different ways of dealing with tragic news, or tragedy itself. Perhaps it’s their own self-defence mechanism or that they’ve been through some of their own shit.

But in case you can’t see it coming, “shit” is legitimately one of the dumbest, fucking things you can ever say to anyone when it comes to anything.

Words have power

Now this isn’t about me. It isn’t about death either.

It’s not about me being oversensitive or that it’s just how people deal with certain situations.

It’s personal fucking pride and the willingness to adhere to the fact that the small things in life makes or break your character.

And it’s sad that most people don’t give a shit.

This is why you’ve people today spewing crap out of their mouths, especially the kids today. I remember listening to a friend joking about he was going to rape another friend’s girlfriend, which was highly ironic considering the former can’t get girls for shit.

What else do we have?

Nigga. Slave. Cunt. Any expletive directed to your mom. Retard. A direct reference to one’s skin color.

And many more! Welcome to the Wheel of Misfortune.

Watch your words friends. People do judge and that’s actually something important. It’s a way for all of us to fit in, reflect and filter out the moron inside of you.

Do you want more honest-as-fuck stories like this?

2 comments

  1. Absolutely Tara - March 31, 2015 7:35 pm

    Great post. I think it’s definitely hard to decide what to say when someone has experienced a loss. We recently had a friend’s wife die of breast cancer, and my husband and I actually discussed what to say to him. We didn’t want to sound calloused, but we didn’t want to be invasive. In the end, we said, “We’re so sorry for your loss,” in a caring tone, and left it at that.

    Words do have incredible power, and I’m glad you’re calling people on it. Well done.

    -Tara

    Reply
    • alden - April 1, 2015 7:14 am

      Thanks Tara.

      That’s better than “shit.” haha.

      I also had a lot of “You should have told me.” As good as their intentions were, I knew they were going to do nothing anyway. One of them texted me that line, and after I tried to continue the conversations, she all but disappeared. No reply whatsoever.

      Reply

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