About Me


This is Alden Tan! And welcome to the blog of Honest and Real Stories For People Who Want To Be Happy But Can’t Stand Self-Help

The blog that wants to help you, but without any cheesy bullshit

Straight up, this blog about personal development and self-improvement. Its topics ranges from life, relationships, social dynamics to writing and blogging as an entrepreneur.

But… there will be no cheesy bullshit.

I don’t know about you, I hate all the annoying, cliched and trite advice we have out there in the self-help industry today. In fact, I find a lot of advice out there, from supposed entrepreneurs, gurus and experts to be downright insensitive.

They lack empathy.

Everyone’s talking about how great life is, when really, sometimes it’s not. It’s just life.

Everyone’s talking about how happiness is a choice, when really, sometimes it’s not the case for someone. I mean, tell this to a starving kid in Africa or in Syria.

Everyone’s dishing out their life hacks, tips, tricks and overnight cures when really, sometimes professional therapy and even medication are the answers.

Everyone’s regurgitating the same old, motivational quotes, pasted atop a pretty picture of the sunset of some shit, when really, sometimes we aren’t in the mood for such shit.

Most of all, everyone’s conveniently attaching a ridiculously high price-tag on their products that is supposed to heal all your woes. $997 for an online course that’s going to make you happy FOREVER?! I once talked to some life coach (ugh) who claimed to me that he never felt anger again in his life ever since he started meditating.

Give me a break…

Can we just stop meditating and just grab a beer?

Now of course, I do believe self-improvement is important. A curious mindset and hunger to learn are require to become better.

And I think it’s better to do that with honest and real stories. That’s why I am here.

As you’re reading this, this blog is over six years old with over 500+ articles written and published across the web, including at popular websites such as Thought Catalog, Elite Daily and Reader’s Digest. I’ve also gathered over 10,000+ subscribers who have opted in to get my free book, 12 Things Happy People Don’t Give a Fuck About!

How did I achieve all of that?

With my honest and real style. My stories are extremely honest, open and I go straight to the issue without beating around the bush. My advice is unique and in-your-face, so you know that there’s no bullshit involved. My style and tone is extremely personal, which is what my readers love.

You want to know what I think about life coaches and why I think they’re a detriment to people? Read this.

You want to know what it feels like to lose my dad and how to get over a loved one? Read this.

You want to know why I prefer to hang out with gay people sometimes? Read this.

You want to know my experience in going through therapy? Read this.

And you can find many more honest and real articles in the archives. Take your time though.

My story

Here’s a little something about me:

My dad died when I was 20, over a decade ago. He suffered from ALS (amyotrophic lateral sclerosis) for a couple of years before succumbing to it.)

That day of course, changed my entire fucking forever. You may read more about it here.

Long story short, I obviously have had my life lessons.

And that made me realize life is short (cliched, but well, true.) I’ve since been doing the whole “quit my job to follow my dream” thing. I love to write. I love to dance (I am a Bboy. Sweet picture below.) I love tattoos. I love talking to girls and I love my beer.

In the six years of writing in this blog, I’ve evolved a lot and it’s all for the better as I get to help YOU in the honest and real style.

So I don’t want to ramble on anymore. This blog isn’t just about me.

It’s for you too!

Thank you for taking the time to read this page. I truly appreciate it.

Some additional goodies:

I write a lot at Quora and Steemit!

Quora is a social, question-and-answer network. I give a ton of my knowledge there, so be sure to check out my profile, follow me and ask me anything!

Steemit is a revolutionary, social network based on blockchain technology where users are paid to write or curate content. Not kidding! It works. Follow me there and check out my EXCLUSIVE work. 

Finally, if you want to stay in touch me, then hop onto my newsletter by getting my free book, 12 Things Happy People Don’t Give A Fuck About! <– Enter your name and email inside.

That’s it! Await more updates in this space!


Want More Honest-As-Fuck Stories Like These?

Then Sign up for my free book here to stay in touch with me! 12 Things Happy People Don't Give a Fuck About! Become happy as fuck so you can do shit you love.


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  1. Jacy Wee - August 23, 2011 12:15 am

    Thank you for sharing your blog. I love your authenticity in expressing who you are — I can almost hear you talking :). Felt your essence when sharing about your dad and would love to hear more of it, what happened, what did you learn from the experience, what’s your call to action to those reading your blog.

    Look forward to your next post ;p

    p.s. Awesome photos by the way… compliments to the photographer.

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  9. Chris - January 25, 2013 10:37 am

    Dude, you are amazing. Thanks for creating this wonderful blog. It truly is inspiring. I’m a bboy too and I want to be a writer! I have a lot of interests in life but most of all is bboying. I’m not a religious person I just happen to have a personal relationship with my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. I don’t know if you believe in Him or not and I’m not forcing you to believe if you don’t cause we all have the freedom of choice. But I pray for you to be saved and one day that maybe you would have Him, Jesus Christ, in your life. Anyway, man keep being real, being you, keep this up. Don’t stop your passion and dreams in life man. You inspire me and all the people who come across your site. It’d be cool to meet you someday bro. A fellow bboy. Much love and peace!

    • alden - January 25, 2013 5:20 pm

      Peace man! Gonna reply your email in full soon.

      Thanks for the heads up :). Keep breaking man!

  10. Marissa - February 28, 2013 3:41 pm

    I wasn’t planning on signing up for your blog b/c frankly I’m on too many lists already BUT after reading why you do this I am board. I lost my 18-year old sister in 1998 and my 33-year old brother in 2008 — both suddenly. Yeah — it knocked me down, but I got up and dusted myself off. You’ve got to live your dreams and I am making it my mission to help others do it too.

    I love your message!

    • alden - March 1, 2013 2:12 am

      Glad you did then!

      So sorry you had to go through all of that.

      Good on you for not going in the dark, and instead making something positive out of it. And truly… I can’t imagine my own life knowing I lost more than ONE loved one.

  11. Siegfried - February 28, 2013 6:25 pm

    Hello Alden!
    your thoughts are really interesting, great blog!
    Best Regards!

    • alden - March 1, 2013 2:10 am

      Thanks man! Glad to see you here.

  12. Inspiring Citizen Rafi - March 6, 2013 4:56 pm

    Hello Alden,

    I believe, you are the rite person whom I was looking forward to talk with because your message is exactly what I have been trying to strive for..

    See my passion is to travel the world, talk to people and inspire them through my training and motivational speaking..

    Since I am the bread winner of my family and since I dont have any financial back-up I am in a state of confusion whether to leave my job or not..What will be your advise in this stage?

    • alden - March 9, 2013 5:35 am

      Hey man,

      Well I say, take tiny steps towards what you love. Don’t just go all in now as you have responsibilities towards yourself and others.

      The key is real tiny steps.

  13. Susanna Brown - March 21, 2013 4:34 am

    Hi Alden,

    I lost my dad from cancer and I never forgive. The pain and anger was too much to bear when he was alive.

    I forgive him only after all this years which I am not proud of.

    Your blog really connects with me. Thank you so much.

    • alden - March 21, 2013 4:57 am

      Sorry to hear that, but great you’ve moved on.

      See you around.

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  15. Tamilyn - April 9, 2013 7:16 pm

    your sir .. are just what i needed today .. 🙂 keep it up i will be back often 🙂 love and hugs


    • alden - April 11, 2013 8:58 am

      Why thank you. Hugs.

  16. jasz - April 11, 2013 8:16 am

    I may not like your being vulgar,
    because it feels violent to me
    and that scares me.
    I know there is a loving heart behind it though,
    so I want to stick around anyway.

    • alden - April 11, 2013 8:57 am

      Cool. Open up a little. There’re worse out there suffering.

  17. Sarah Li Cain - May 13, 2013 3:05 am

    Wow! I am instantly hooked! I am trying to get my baddassery or gusto again after losing it over the years and this blog really made my day. I’m officially a regular reader!

    • alden - May 13, 2013 4:58 am

      Thanks Sarah. Glad to have you here.

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  19. Dawn - July 18, 2013 5:17 pm

    I love your way of thinking. I feel the same. Just have to throw up your hands up and say *&%^ it. I lost my father back in 1992. One night I was talking to him on the phone and the next day the next thing I knew he was dead from being shot to death. My world changed and after years of depression and grief my tolerance level to stupid stuff was very low. I continue to speak up for myself and avoid or stop interference from untruths about me that interfere with my life. I have been reading many self help books and I have found a new me that can heal from being hurt and see like you that all there is is LIFE. Live it to the fullest and be happy being yourself. Thanks for your blog. This is the first time I have every replied.

    • alden - August 4, 2013 8:47 pm

      We’re the same then.

      I don’t bother with fucked up people and friends anymore. I just walk man. And live the life I want.

  20. Fiona Tay - July 21, 2013 3:08 am

    Not keep it real like, “Yo yo daddyo check out ma blog ma crib yo”.Hahahaha! That’s really funny, Alden! I like to read your posts! Keep them coming! :))I like “opened up” posts. Real. Original. True.

    • alden - August 4, 2013 8:45 pm

      Thanks so much Fiona!

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  22. Jake Smith - October 28, 2013 7:57 am

    Hey Alden

    Today I’m looking for inspiration and motivation, actually I’m struggling with writers block. Perhaps I’m too old (62) for your blog but I find it very interesting to see what people are up to out there.

    I will soon have my own blog out there where you can get to know me better.

    I am a semi-retired Instrumentation Engineer with a passion for writing, motivational stuff without losing sight of reality. Be practical.

    I believe one must do what you are born to do and passionate about.

    If I can help one person to be successful in life then I have succeeded in my quest.

    Life doesn’t come with a money-back guarantee. Believe in yourself. Love yourself. You are what you thinketh.

    The only person who will be with you all your life through thick and thin is you yourself. So … it may be a good idea to become best friends with yourself.

    Go for it buddy!

    Jake (The Wizard) Smith
    Author: ‘Out on parole …’

    P.S. I’ve never been in jail but often jailed in my mind … through my thoughts and the choices and decisions I made.

  23. Navin Joelle - November 4, 2013 10:45 am

    Hi Alden, pretty impressive blog I must say. Will be following this site from now on. Take care bro, hope to catch up with you in real time.

    • alden - November 5, 2013 3:40 am

      Thanks dude.

  24. frdz - December 1, 2013 7:55 am

    Hey alden.,wassup bro?.i just want to say thanks for ur helping me to overcome allwgats holding me back,just by saying ur magic word,.fuck it-hehe,and bcoz im conpervative,i change d word a bit and becomes pak it! Haha.,but really bro,it helpd me a lot.,thanks to you!

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  26. Deb - February 21, 2014 7:50 pm

    You have some great messages…too bad you mess things up with all those 4-letter words…seriously DUDE take a pill or something and calm down and people will truly enjoy what you have to say…just a thought…take it or leave it…something to think about…great things come from great thinkers and great people not foul mouth idiots carrying big clubs

    • alden - February 21, 2014 11:26 pm

      Strange. Others call it authenticity and they love it. Does that make you the different cave woman or something?

  27. ceejay - March 8, 2014 3:43 pm

    I think i like your raw quality of being yourself and not people pleasing. Doing your thing to express your real self. That resonates with me. Keep it up, man!

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