Okay I’ve had it with seeing so much positive bullshit on my Facebook feed or across the web.
I think positivity is cool, but as with everything else in life, too much of it ain’t good. Seriously.
And unbridled positivity, even when coming from people with good intentions can turn out to be extremely insensitive or annoying.
Let’s fuck this shit up! All of the following are found by me across the web. I’m pretty sure you’ve stumbled upon them yourself.
13 quotes on positivity that need a makeover
That means Thank God It’s Monday. What! Who the fuck thanks god it’s Monday?!
A better quote: “Fuck Mondays. Go back to sleep. Wake up at a better time. If you have to go to work, just go to work, shut up and go home. It’ll pass soon.”.
2) “Forgive someone today”
If you think you get to forgive random people, then you’re arrogant, cause you think you’re Jesus. If you force yourself to forgive someone when you aren’t ready, because you’re still pissed and shit, then it’s not going to help you at all. The mismatch of your actions and how you feel is just going to build up repression and fuck you up inside.
A better quote: “Forgive yourself today. Because you deserve to stop holding on to shit that doesn’t do you any good”
3) “Do a good deed today”
Man! This is way easier said than done. So many of us got shit to worry about. It’s almost impossible to want to help others.
A better quote: “Be happy first. Then go makes other happy even in really tiny ways”.
4) “Practice gratitude”
Another one that’s easier said than done. It’s pretty hard when everything around you is seemingly unfair and against you. Annoying people would always tell you to find things to be thankful for. That’s like trudging through shit just to find some perfume to spray on yourself.
A better quote: “Is life getting you down? Don’t thank that shit then. Go create a better life you can be thankful for instead”.
5) “Practice positive thinking”
So damn cliché.
A better quote: “Don’t think at all. Quiet your mind. Go to sleep”
6) “Good things come to those who wait”
I know of a lot of people who strongly disagree with this. Who the fuck wants to wait? I can’t even wait for the bus. It’s a waste of time.
A better quote: “Good things come to smart people who don’t want to wait, but instead get off their asses and make shit happen”.
7) “Always be yourself”
This is so fucking complicated. It’s pretty hard (and insensitive) to tell someone who’s going through depression to be themselves. They don’t even love themselves. What about angry people who’ve done shit they regretted in life?
“Yourself” ultimately is controversial, depending on what you think. But whatever, we aren’t going for debates here.
A better quote: “Don’t like being yourself? It’s ok. Nothing wrong with that. Look in the mirror. Fucking change what you don’t like and become more awesome”.
8) “Always look on the bright side of life”
I bet you just read that with that annoying tune from the advertisement of long ago. Honestly, this quote works. It’s positive. It’s all encompassing. Too bad it’s cliché as fuck.
A better quote: “Go ahead and be pissed, sad or whatever. Take your time, but hurry. Remember to get over yourself”.
I gotta smile and be happy ALL THE TIME? Yeah right. Only deluded people smile all the time.
A better quote: “Don’t smile if you’re pissed or unhappy. You’ll look stupid. Go home and make yourself feel better first”.
Or, “You’re somebody’s reason to smile”
10) “Money can’t buy happiness”
Man, we already know that. It kind of doesn’t apply to people who don’t even have much as they’re struggling to get some money to buy food and shit in the first place! Or for people like me, sure, money is going to make me happy ultimately, but buying nice shit definitely will. I don’t mind that!
A better quote to think about: “Some people are so poor that all they have is money”
11) “Do or do not, there is no try”
Shut up Yoda.
A better quote: “Failure only comes when you stop trying”.
12) “Show love everywhere you go”
Sorry, but people have fucked up the meaning of love lately. What kind of love is it when you expect something in return?
A better quote: “Show unconditional love everywhere you go”
13) “Always be positive”
How do you ALWAYS be positive? Seriously. We’re human. We’re flawed. We’re bound to feel shitty from time to time.
A better quote: “Don’t take life so seriously. Have fun when you can. Don’t get offended by little things like blog posts”.